January 12, 1900
Difference between knowledge of self and humility. Jesus alone can glory in possessing true humility.
Difference between knowledge of self and humility. Jesus alone can glory in possessing true humility.
Finding myself in my usual state, my adorable
Jesus came in a pitiful state. He had His hands bound tightly, His face covered
with spit, and many people were slapping Him horribly. And He remained quiet,
placid, without making one movement or emitting one lament; not even a batting
of eyelashes, in order to show that He Himself wanted to suffer these outrages;
and this, not only externally, but also internally. What a moving scene, such
as to break the hardest hearts! How many things that Face said, with that spit
hanging, dirtied with mud! I felt horrified, I trembled, I saw myself all pride
before Jesus.
While He was in that appearance, He said to
me: “My daughter, only the little ones let themselves be handled as one wants;
not those who are little of human reason, but those who are little yet filled
with divine reason. I alone can say that I am humble, because in man, that
which is said to be humility should rather be called knowledge of self; and one
who does not know himself already walks in falsehood.”
Jesus remained silent
for a few minutes, and I stayed there, contemplating Him. While I was doing
this, I saw a hand carrying a light, which, searching in my interior, in the
most intimate hiding places, wanted to see whether the knowledge of myself and love
of humiliations, confusions and opprobriums, were present in me. That light
found a void in my interior – and I too saw it – which had to be filled with
humiliations and confusions, in the example of blessed Jesus. Oh, how many
things that light and that holy Face which was before me, made me understand! I
said to myself: ‘A God, humiliated and confused for love of me, and I, a
sinner, without these insignia! A God, stable, firm in bearing so many insults,
to the point that He does not move, not one bit, to shake that disgusting spit
off of Himself. Ah, His interior before God, and His exterior before men are
made manifest to me; and yet, if He wanted to free Himself, He could, because
it is not the chains that bind Him, but His firm Will, which wants to save
mankind at any cost. And I? And I? Where are my humiliations? Where, the
firmness, the constancy in doing good for love of my Jesus and for love of my
neighbor? Ah, how different we are as victims – myself and Jesus! Ah, we are
not similar at all!
While my little brain
was wandering in this, my adorable Jesus told me: “Only my Humanity was filled
with opprobriums and humiliations, to the point that they overflowed outside.
This is why Heaven and earth tremble before my virtues, and the souls who love
Me use my Humanity as a staircase in order to ascend and lap up a few little
drops of my virtues. Tell me now: before my humility, where is yours? I alone
can glory in possessing true humility. My Divinity, united to my Humanity,
could operate prodigies at each step, word and work; yet, I voluntarily
constrained Myself within the circle of my Humanity, I showed Myself as the
poorest, and I reached the point of mingling with sinners themselves. I could
have done the Work of Redemption in very little time, and even with one single
word; yet, during the course of many years, with many hardships and sufferings,
I wanted to make the miseries of man my own; I wanted to exercise Myself in
many different actions, so that man might be completely renewed and divinized,
even in the lowest works. In fact, once they had been exercised by Me, who was
God and Man, they received new splendor, and remained with the mark of divine
works. My Divinity, hidden within my Humanity, wanted to lower Itself to such
baseness, subjecting Itself to the course of human actions - while with one
single act of my Will I could have created infinite worlds - feeling the
miseries and the weaknesses of others as if they were Its own, seeing Itself
covered with all the sins of men before Divine Justice, having to pay their
penalty at the price of unheard-of pains and with the shedding of all Its
Blood…. Thus It exercised continuous acts of profound and heroic humility.
Oh daughter, here is
the immense difference between my humility and the humility of creatures, even
that of all of my Saints, which is only a shadow in the face of mine; because
the creature is always a creature and does not know, as I know, how great is
the weight of sin. Even though heroic souls, following my example, have offered
themselves to suffer the pains of others, their pains are not different from
those of the other creatures; they are not new things for them, because they
are made of the same clay. Moreover, the mere thought that those pains are the
cause of new gains, and that they glorify God, is a great honor for them.
Furthermore, the creature is restricted within the circle in which God placed
her, and she cannot go out of those limits within which she has been
circumscribed by God. Oh, if it were in their power to do or undo things, how
many other things they would do - everyone would reach the stars! But my
divinized Humanity had no limits, yet It voluntarily constrained Itself within
Itself; and this was the braiding of all my works with heroic humility.
This had been the
cause of all evils which inundate the earth – lack of humility; and by
exercising this virtue, I was to draw all goods from Divine Justice. Ah, yes,
no concessions of graces come from my throne, if not by means of humility, nor
can any ticket be received by Me, if it does not carry the signature of
humility. No prayer is listened to by my ears, and moves my Heart to
compassion, if it is not perfumed by the fragrance of humility. If the creature
does not arrive at destroying that seed of honor, of esteem – and this can be
destroyed by arriving at loving to be despised, humiliated, confused – she will
feel a braiding of thorns around her heart; she will feel a void in her heart
which will always bother her, and will render her very dissimilar from my Most
Holy Humanity. If she does not arrive at loving humiliations, at the most she
will be able to know herself a little bit, but will not shine before Me,
clothed with the garment of humility, beautiful and worthy of sympathy.”
Who can say how many
things I understood about this virtue, and the difference between knowledge of
self and humility? I seemed to touch with my own hand the distinction between
these two virtues, but I have no words to explain myself.
In order to say
something, I will use an image. For example, a poor man says he is poor, and he
frankly manifests his poverty, also to people who do not know him and who may
believe that he possesses something. One can say that he knows himself and
tells the truth; and because of this, he is loved more, he moves others to
compassion for his miserable state, and everyone helps him. So it is to know
oneself. If then, feeling ashamed of manifesting his poverty, that poor man
boasted of being rich, while everyone knows that he does not even have clothes
to cover himself and that he is dying of starvation – what happens? Everyone
despises him, nobody helps him, and he becomes an object of mockery and
ridicule to anyone who knows him; and the miserable one, going from bad to
worse, ends up dying. So is pride before God and also before other men. And
here is how one who does not know himself already leaves the truth and slumps
into the path of falsehood.
Now, here is the
difference with humility, though it seems to me that knowledge of self and
humility are sisters born of the same womb, and one can never be humble if he
does not know himself. For example, there is a rich man who, out of love for
humiliations, stripping himself of his noble garments, covers himself with
miserable rags. He lives unknown, manifesting to no one who he is; he mingles
with the poorest, he lives with the poor as if he were one of them, and makes
scorns and confusions his delights. Here is the beautiful sister of the
knowledge of self, which is humility.
Ah, yes, humility draws grace; humility breaks
the strongest chains, which are sin. Humility surmounts any wall of division
between the soul and God, and brings her back to Him. Humility is a little
plant, but always green and flowery, not subject to being gnawed by worms; nor
will winds, hail or heat be able to do harm to it, or make it wither, even
slightly. Though being the littlest plant, humility produces very high
branches, which penetrate even into Heaven, braiding around the Heart of Our
Lord; and only the branches which come from this plant have free access into
that adorable Heart. Humility is the anchor of peace during the storms of the
sea waves of this life. Humility is the salt which spices all virtues and
preserves the soul from the corruption of sin. Humility is the little grass
which sprouts along the way treaded by wayfarers; while being treaded, it
disappears, but soon one can see it sprout again, more beautiful than before.
Humility is like a gentle graft, which renders the wild plant gentle. Humility
is the sunset of guilt. Humility is the coin of grace. Humility is like the
moon, which guides us in the darkness of the night of this life. Humility is
like that shrewd merchant who knows well how to trade his riches, and wastes
not even one cent of the grace that is given to him. Humility is the key of the
door of Heaven, such that no one can enter into It if he does not keep this key
in good custody. Finally – otherwise I would never end and I would be too long
– humility is the smile of God and of all Heaven, and it is the crying of all
hell.
January
22, 1900
Correspondence to Grace.
Correspondence to Grace.
After
going through most bitter days of privation, my poor heart was struggling
between the fear of having lost Him and the hope that, who knows, I might see
Him again. Oh God, what a bloody war this poor heart of mine had to bear! The
pain was so great that now it would become ice-cold, now it would be squeezed
as though under a press, and would drip blood. While I was in this state, I
felt my sweet Jesus near me; He removed a veil from me which prevented me from
seeing Him, so finally I was able to see Him. Immediately I said to Him: ‘Ah,
Lord! You don’t love me any more!’
And
He: “Yes, yes… What I recommend to you is correspondence to my grace, and in
order to be faithful, you must be like the echo that resounds in an empty
space: as soon as a voice is emitted, immediately, without the slightest
hesitation, one can hear the echo booming after it. In the same way, as soon as
you begin to receive my grace, without even waiting for Me to finish giving it,
begin immediately the echo of your correspondence.”
January
31, 1900
Grace, and correspondence to It.
Grace, and correspondence to It.
After
He came quite a few times, but always in silence, I felt a void and a pain for
I could not hear the most sweet voice of my sweet Jesus; and He, coming back,
almost to content me, told me: “Grace is the life of the soul. Just as the soul
gives life to the body, so does grace give life to the soul. However, in order
to have life it is not enough for the body to have the soul; it also needs food
with which to nourish itself and grow to the proper stature. In the same way,
it is not enough for the soul to have grace in order to have life, but food is
needed to nourish her and raise her to the proper stature. And what is this
food? It is her correspondence. So grace, and correspondence to it, form the
links of the chain which lead her to Heaven, and according to the measure in
which the soul corresponds to grace, she keeps forming the links of this
chain.”
Then
He added: “What is the passport to enter into the kingdom of grace? It is
humility. Through humility, by always looking at her nothingness and seeing
that she is nothing but dust or wind, the soul will place all her trust in
grace, so much so, as to make of it her master. And grace, taking dominion over
all of the soul, leads her along the path of all virtues, and makes her reach
the summit of perfection.”
What
would a soul without grace be like? It seemed to me that she would be like the
body without the soul, which becomes stinking and spews worms and rot from all
parts, so much so, as to become an object of horror to the human sight itself.
In the same way, without grace, the soul becomes so abominable as to be
horrifying to the sight – not of men, but of God Trice Holy. Ah, Lord, free me
from such misfortune, and from the abominable monster of sin!
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